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Did I hear that right?
This page is the transcript for "It's Not Easy Being Green". Feel free to correct any errors. If you need any help, please see our policies.

SCENE: Oz. Past. A green cyclone drops a basket besides a yellow-brick road. In the distance, the Emerald City can be seen. A woodcutter and his wife are walking along the road. A baby can be heard wailing.



Woodcutter's Wife: Did you hear that?
Woodcutter: Nothing. Stick to the road. (His wife notices the basket.)
Woodcutter's Wife: Oh, where did it come from?
Woodcutter: The cyclone must have dropped it. Dear, what are you doing?
Woodcutter's Wife: (She picks it up, revealing a baby girl.) What do you expect me to do? Leave the poor thing to the wolves? She's beautiful. (A branch is close to breaking overhead. The Woodcutter notices the baby raises a finger, magically changing the branch’s direction; causing no harm as it falls to the ground some yards away. However, his wife remains oblivious.)
Woodcutter: (Nervously.) She did that. She knocked that tree away.
Woodcutter's Wife: Calm your nerves, dear. It was just the wind. She's only a babe and she needs our help. Can we keep her?
Woodcutter: That's not a good idea. Didn't you see what she did? She's not like us.
Woodcutter's Wife: You're right, she's not. She's alone and we’re going to take care of her. Now, stick to the road or we'll never make it to the Emerald City before dawn. (She starts walking on again.)
Woodcutter: What should we call her?
Woodcutter's Wife: What about Zelena? She's going to be the happiest baby in all of Oz.


SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. Storybrooke Graveyard. Mourners, including Emma, Mary Margaret, David, Regina, Robin Hood, Hook, Henry and Belle attend Neal’s funeral. Neal is laid to rest. Hook takes up a shovel and scoops soil to bury Neal’s coffin.

SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. Zelena's Farmhouse. A grieving Mr. Gold doubles over in pain.

SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. Storybrooke graveyard. Regina, David and Belle follow Hook’s example. Then Emma encourages Henry to scoop soil on his father’s coffin. Lastly, Emma herself takes up a shovel.

SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. Zelena's Farmhouse. Zelena walks up to Mr. Gold’s cage.


Zelena: You've spent so long figuring out how to get to this land, groomed Regina to cast your curse, spent twenty-eight years waiting for it to be broken, all that you can be with your son. Now, he's gone. Tell me, Rumple, was he really worth all that trouble?
Mr. Gold: Every bit of it. He was family. Something you know nothing about.


SCENE: OZ. Past. Zelena, now a young adult, is helping her father to shave.


Zelena: How's that, father? (She hands him a mirror.)
Woodcutter: You've missed a spot. (Zelena resumes shaving her father.) No matter, how you feel on the inside, Zelena, remember to always put on a good face.
Zelena: I know, father. (Accidentally, she cuts him.)
Woodcutter: Careless child. (Using magic, Zelena makes a clean cloth appear in order to attend to the cut. Her father is terrified.) Don't touch me!
Zelena: I'm sorry. I can't help it.
Woodcutter: You mean you can't control it.
Zelena: Maybe if you'd let me learn how to—
Woodcutter: Then everyone would see what you really are. Wicked.
Zelena: How can you say that to your own daughter?
Woodcutter: Because you're not my daughter! There, I’ve said it. After all these years your mother's gone now I can finally tell you the truth.
Zelena: What's it you're talking about?
Woodcutter: You're not our child, Zelena. We found you in the woods. In a basket. Dropped out of a tornado. Your mother wanted to take you in, she was lulled by your beauty. But under the surface there was something else—your wickedness.
Zelena: (Crying) I'd rather be wicked than a sad old drunk.
Woodcutter: What do you think drove me to drink, child? Wipe away those tears and put on a good face! Make me breakfast.
Zelena: I think not. If I really caused you this much trouble, I'll spare you any more.
Woodcutter: Where do you think you're going?
Zelena: To see the one person who can help me find a family who wants me! The Wizard of Oz.


SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. Granny's Diner. Emma is throwing darts as every single one hits the bull's eye. Hook approaches her.



Hook: Perhaps I should paint a bull's eye on the Wicked Witch's back.
Emma: She'll get more than a dart when I find her.
Hook: I know you're hurting, Swan, but there are better ways to grieve Baelfire’s death than letting anger overcome you.
Emma: Let me guess—rum?
Hook: (Drawing a flask from his jacket.) Never hurts.
Emma: I'll stick with anger. At least, until I’ve dealt with Zelena.
Hook: Take it from me: Vengeance isn't the thing that's gonna make you feel better.
Emma: It'll make this town safer. (Glancing at Henry, who is sitting in a booth.) Besides, I promised Henry I'd find the person responsible for his father's death. It's really all I can do for him right now.
Hook: That can't be true. Have you tried talking to the boy?
Emma: As far as he is concerned, I haven't seen Neal since he left me in jail. So anything I'd tell him about his dad being a hero sounds like I'm making that up just to get him to feel better.
Hook: Perhaps I can talk to him.
Emma: About what? Leather conditioner and eyeliner?
Hook: I knew Bae as a boy. Perhaps Henry’d like to hear what his father was like when he was his age.
Emma: You'd really do that?
Hook: Aye. Could help the boy make peace with his father's passing. And me.
Emma: Be careful. Zelena's still out there.
Hook: I assure you, nothing will happen to the boy while he's in my charge. (They both walk over to Henry.)
Emma: Henry, do you remember Killian?
Hook: Hello, Henry.


SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. Elsewhere in Granny’s Diner. From a distance, Regina watches Robin Hood ordering drinks. Tinker Bell enters the diner. As Tinker Bell walks past Robin, she notices the lion tattoo on his arm.



Tinker Bell: It's the lion tattoo. It's what was prophesied. He's your soul mate.
Regina: (Whispering.) I know. I saw it yesterday.
Tinker Bell: And you didn't tell me?
Regina: Well, right now I have better things to do than gossip about boys! (Balancing three glasses, Robin Hood joins them.)
Robin: Care for a drink? (Tinker Bell takes one. Robin Hood turns to address Regina.) I do hope I didn't upset you yesterday.
Regina: (Introducing Tinker Bell to him.) Robin Hood, Tinker Bell. Tinker Bell, Robin Hood.
Tinker Bell: (Shaking his hand) I’ve been wanting to meet you for a very long time.
Regina: And no, you didn't upset me. I just found a clue trail that needed to be followed. One that didn't lead anywhere. (Gestures towards the offered glass, then stops herself.) I don't daytime drink.
Robin: Ah well, perhaps in the evening then. (He nods and takes his leave.)
Tinker Bell: What was all that about? Didn't you learn anything from the last time you screwed this up? If you had been open to the possibility of love when you first saw him, maybe your life wouldn't have turned out so (Tinker Bell stops herself mid-sentence.)
Regina: So what? How did my life turn out?
Tinker Bell: Why am I even bothering? (She walks away.)


SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. Elsewhere Granny’s Diner. Emma joins Mary Margaret and David.



David: How are you holding up?
Emma: How do you think?
Mary Margaret: (Hugs her.) Oh, Emma. (Zelena enters, holding the Dark One Dagger in one hand.)
Zelena: My condolences. So sorry I’ve missed the funeral, but I could never pass up to wake. Oh, did I miss the speeches? Shall I make one? I mean, I am, after all, responsible. (Emma leaps forward. Mary Margaret seizes her daughter’s arm.)
Mary Margaret: Emma, no. Too many people will get hurt.
Zelena: Listen to your mother. Anyone who tries to interfere with my plan is gonna have to deal with the Dark One!
David: (Shields a pregnant Mary Margaret.) Don't come any closer.
Zelena: Don't worry. I'm not here for your baby. Not today, anyway.
Regina: Then why are you here?
Zelena: Now, that my cover's blown, I can finally pay a visit to my little sister.
Regina: Who the hell are you talking about?
Zelena: Why you, of course, Regina.
Emma: What?
Regina: I'm an only child.
Zelena: Cora lied to you, Regina. I'm your sister. Half, if you to get technical.
Regina: Why should I believe anything you say?
Zelena: Oh, you shouldn't. It's a lot to swallow. This is why I brought a gift to help.
Regina: I don't want a gift from you.
Zelena: But you shall have it. See, my gift to you is this sad, sad day. Use it to dig into our past, Regina. You need to learn the truth and you must believe it. And then, meet me on Main Street tonight. Say, sundown.
Regina: And then what?
Zelena: Then I'll destroy you.
Regina: This isn't the Wild West.
Zelena: No, dear. It's the Wicked West. (Turning around to face the assembled guests.) And I want everyone to be there. To see the Evil Queen lose.
Regina: I don't lose.
Zelena: Neither do I. One of us is about to make history. See you tonight, sis.


SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. Storybrooke docks. Hook and Henry enter over to a boat.



Hook: Here. Now that’ll do.
Henry: Another boat?
Hook: You don't like the sea?
Henry: No, it's not that. It's just my mom always seems to put me off to friends that have boats when she's working on a case.
Hook: Your mother didn't put you off to me. I wanted to bring you here.
Henry: Why?
Hook: You might not believe this, but your father and I were mates long before he met your mother.
Henry: Really? You knew my dad? What was he like?
Hook: Hop on board and you'll find out.


SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. Granny’s Diner. David, Emma, Mary Margaret, Regina, and Tinker Bell attempt to make sense of Zelena's threat.



David: And you're sure Cora never said anything about her?
Regina: I think I would remember if my mother told me she had a love child with a scarecrow.
Emma: It doesn't matter if Zelena is your sister or not. She wants you dead. Any idea why?
Regina: I’ve never even met her before today.
Emma: Doesn't mean you did something to piss her off.
Tinker Bell: You did manage to step a lot on people's toes back in our world.
Regina: Well, none of them were green.
Granny: There's that missing year. Maybe you did something to her then.
Regina: Stick to the lasagna, lady. It's starting to sound an awful lot like you're on her side. (She begins leaving.)
Emma: Where are you going?
Regina: To find out exactly what this witch thinks I did to her.


SCENE: OZ. Past. Emerald City. Two guards allow Zelena to enter the Wizard’s audience room. At the far end of the room a curtain can be seen. Flames shoot up from the ground preventing Zelena to step any closer.



The Wizard: I’ve been expecting you. (The shadow of a man appears on the curtain)
Zelena: How did you know I was coming?
The Wizard: I see all. I am Oz. The Great and Terrible. You've come because you wish to find your family.
Zelena: Can you help me?
The Wizard: I will show you what you seek to know. But I warn you: It won't be easy for you.
(Zelena takes a step backwards and watches scenes from her past unfold before her on the floor. A woman placing a basket in the woods can be seen.)
Zelena: Is that my mother?
The Wizard: Her name was Cora. She gave birth to you in another land. A cyclone struck and carried you to this world.
Zelena: Why did she abandon me?
The Wizard: You couldn't give her the one thing she truly wanted. The ability to become royalty.
(The picture changes revealing Regina)
Zelena: Who's that?
The Wizard: Your sister. Regina.
Zelena: Wait. I’ve got a sister?
The Wizard: Your sister could do what your mother wished. Regina became queen.
(The scene changes again. Now, Rumplestiltskin can be seen. He’s preparing a lesson for Regina.)
Zelena: Who's that man?
The Wizard: That is Rumplestiltskin. A very powerful wizard. The most powerful of all the realms. (The picture changes once more. Now, Regina practices wielding magic. Regina fails to master the given task.) Like you, Regina has the gift of magic. But she has been unable to develop it.
Zelena: Magic is a gift?
The Wizard: Yes. And he's trying to teach her that.
Zelena: He should be teaching me. Not her. I need to meet this wizard. I'll pay whatever you desire. Just, please, tell me how to get there.
The Wizard: Look down. (Zelena wears silver slippers.) When you click your heels together three times those slippers will take you wherever you desire.
Zelena: What do you want in return?
The Wizard: I simply ask that you bring me something of Rumpelstiltskin's. Be careful: It is one thing to wonder about your past but another to become envious of things you cannot have.
(Zelena clicks her heels together three times and green smoke covers her.)


SCENE: The Enchanted Forest. Past. Dark Palace. Zelena is transported to Regina’s chambers. Zelena looks around the room and opens a wardrobe. Finally, she walks to the dressing table and decides to try the magical task Rumpelstiltskin has given Regina. Smoothly, Zelena succeeds. She is unaware that Rumplestiltskin is watching.



Rumplestiltskin: Well, this is a day of surprises. I thought it would take you at least until— (He stops in mid-sentence; noticing that the woman is not Regina.) You're not Regina.
Zelena: No. I'm Cora's other daughter.
Rumplestiltskin: That's not possible.
Zelena: I'm Zelena. Her first-born.
Rumplestiltskin: We'll see about that. (Rumplestiltskin tears out a hair from Zelena's head and applies it to a potion, which becomes strongly green. Amazed, he looks at the result.) Oh, hello, dearie. A day of surprises indeed.


SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. Mills Mausoleum Regina is looking for something. Mary Margaret is watching her nearby.



Mary Margaret: Regina, is she telling the truth?
Regina: I don't know. I haven't found anything yet.
Mary Margaret: Are you sure Cora didn't set any traps or stuff? I don't think a sleeping curse would be good for the baby. (Regina picks up a letter. Emma joins Mary Margaret.)
Emma: David, Belle and Tink are locking down main street in case this fight actually happens.
Mary Margaret: Regina, did you find something?
Regina: (Reading silently) A letter.
Emma: What does it say?
Regina: (Reading silently) Zelena is my sister.
Mary Margaret: Regina, what is it?
Regina: Nothing. Don't worry about it. It's my fight. I got it handled. (Hurriedly, she walks past Emma and Mary Margaret and leaves the vault.)
Emma: What the hell was in that letter?


SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. Main street. David, Belle and Tinker Bell walk down the street.



David: If we position someone there, there and there we'll have the whole street covered.
Tinker Bell: I'll talk to Blue. See if we can get any reinforcement. (Emma and Mary Margaret join them.)
Emma: No. Haven't you heard Zelena? She said no interference. She would have Gold level half the block if we try something before she has a little chat with her sister.
Tinker Bell: So, they really are sisters?
Mary Margaret: She found a letter in her vault confirming it.
David: Where is she? Regina?
Mary Margaret: She disappeared. Something in that letter upset her.
Tinker Bell: Should we try to find her?
Emma: Regina was pretty clear she didn't want any help on this one.
David: You'll let her walk into this fight alone?
Emma: No, she's gonna get help whether she wants it or not.
Belle: But you just said we can't interfere.
Emma: Because Zelena has Gold on her side we need to remove him from the occasion. It's the only way Regina has a fighting chance. We just need to get his dagger.
Mary Margaret: You saw Zelena. She practically has it in her hand.
Belle: Wait. What if I can get through to Rumple without the dagger?
Mary Margaret: It's worth a try. Regina can't do this alone.


SCENE: Storybrooke, Present day. Somewhere in the woods. Again, Regina reads silently the letter she found in her vault. Patrolling the area an armed Robin Hood recognizes Regina and decides to approach her.



Robin Hood: We have to stop meeting like this. (Turning around Regina pockets the letter)
Regina: Did the Charmings send you to give me a pep talk? Cause I don't do all the pep talk.
Robin Hood: No, nothing of the sort. After Zelena's threat I decided to patrol the woods. In case she'd decided to build the ranks of her simian army. (He sits down beside Regina) How are you holding up?
Regina: I'm not a flying monkey if that's what you mean. (Robin Hood chuckles)
Robin Hood: So, you're gonna tell me what's in that letter you've been starring at?
Regina: What letter?
Robin Hood: This one. (Holding up the letter so that she can see he has taken it). I'm a pickpocket by trade. I spent many years learning how to rob from magicians.
Regina: You're lucky I'm saving my strength for that witch.
Robin Hood: I think, deep down you actually wanna talk about what's in there.
Regina: What makes you think you know me so well?
Robin Hood: Well, for one thing I'd be charred to a crisp by now, if you didn't.
Regina: True.
Robin Hood: So, can I read it?
Regina: Not stopping you.
Robin Hood (reading aloud) „Cora, dear. I’ve finally got my hands on your first born. Never thought I’d find her, did you? Now I know why: She’s the most powerful sorceress I’ve ever encountered. Even more powerful than you. Stunning in every way.“
Rather complimentary I'd say. Why is this troubling you?
Regina: I’ve seen that letter a hundred times before. In my darkest moments I'd go to it for comfort. For solace. For brace when I needed it. Because I- Because I always thought it was about me.
Robin Hood: It's about Zelena.
Regina: Rumpelstiltskin thinks she's more powerful than I am.
Robin Hood: Why do you care what that imp thinks?
Regina: (downcast) Because, if the man who taught me everything I know about magic, thinks she is stronger than I am, then there's no way I can win this fight.


SCENE: The Enchanted Forest. Past. Zelena and Rumpelstiltskin walk together in the woods.



Zelena: Cora never mentioned me?
Rumplestiltskin: A first born daughter? I think that's something I would remember. Now, there's a spell, a curse I’ve been working on for a very long time. Now I foresaw that that curse can only be cast by Cora's daughter.
Zelena: That's why you've been training Regina. You thought she was going to cast the curse.
Rumplestiltskin: Until today. Shall we see what you can do? Magic isn't about what you see, dearie, it's about what you feel inside. (Using a black cloth he blindfolds Zelena) You'll have to dig deep if you wanna pass tonight's test.
Zelena: What am I meant to do?
Rumplestiltskin: Simple. Find me. (Using magic, he teleports himself. Now, Rumplestiltskin is standing behind Zelena) Over here, dearie. (Surprised, Zelena turns around. Leaning on a tree Rumpelstiltskin appears in front of Zelena, only a few yards away from her. Again, she’s unable to catch him) Close, but not close enough. Magic comes from emotion. Simply think of a moment that makes you sieve with anger.
Zelena: And use it to feel the magic. Yes, I’ve learned that a long time ago. It's hard to pick one. Finding out that my mother abandoned me. That my father never wanted me.
Rumplestiltskin: Getting warmer.
Zelena: (in a high-pitched voice) That my sister got everything I’ve ever desired. That she didn't even have to present something. It all just happened. And she doesn't even know that. (Successfully, Zelena grabs Rumpelstiltskin by the arm)
Rumplestiltskin: Ding Dong. There it is. I can feel it in your nails.
Zelena: Sorry, I lost control.
Rumplestiltskin: And now, you need to think of a moment of happiness rein in some of that anger.
Zelena: What do you think about?
Rumplestiltskin: I'm the teacher. I ask the questions.
Zelena: But, if you don't tell me that how will I learn?
Rumplestiltskin: Well, like you, I was abandoned as a child. Some spinsters took us in. We didn't have much. But we got by. Whenever we finished a job they used to bake meat pie. The entire hovel would fill with the most wonderful smell. And after they were cold they always let me take the first bite. And as the food warmed my body that was the only time I forgot who I really was. A boy who wasn't wanted by his papa.
Zelena: Mhm. (smiles) Then, I know my moment.
Rumplestiltskin: What's that, dearie?
Zelena: The moment I stopped feeling like someone who wasn't wanted. The moment you agreed to train me.


SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. Zelena's Farmhouse. Belle approaches the storm cellar.



Emma: All clear. There's no sign of Zelena. It looks like she's still keeping Gold in the cellar. (Belle hurriedly enters the storm cellar)
Belle: Rumple?
Mr. Gold: Belle?
Belle: I’ve come to free you.
Mr. Gold: No, leave. Leave. You have no idea what this witch will make me do to you. She can't see you with me.
Belle: I'm not afraid. You would never hurt me.
Mr. Gold: It's futile. As long as she holds the dagger I can't leave.
Belle: I'm not leaving without you.
Mr. Gold: It's not worth the risk.
Belle: Just. try. You just have to believe in us. (Belle offers Mr. Gold a hand and he stands up.)
Mr. Gold: Run!
Belle: (surprised) What?
Mr. Gold: Run! Go!
Zelena: (laughing) Don't let be. Carry on. I was just enjoying the show. (Belle flees the cellar. Emma, David and Tinker Bell are waiting outside)
Emma: Belle?
David: Over here.
Belle: It was a trick. She's toying with us.
Mr. Gold: (climbing out of the cellar) Zelena sends a message. She will face Regina and no one interferes. Next time you try to stop her I will kill you.


SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. On the beach. Henry puts a rope and a book aside.



Henry: I think I’ve tried every knot in here. When do we get to the part about my dad?
Hook: (looking up to the sky he’s waiting for the stars to rise) Just a few moments longer. There. Come here. (Hook waves Henry nearer and hands Henry his sextant.)
Henry: What's this?
Hook: That, my boy, is a sextant. It's used by sailors to navigate.
Henry: Like a GPS?
Hook: Aye. It measures our position using the stars.
Henry: Not sure, if that's what a GPS does, but what does this have to do with my dad?
Hook: I taught him to navigate with one. Just like I'm gonna teach you.
Henry: Were you both in the Navy or something?
Hook: No, Bae - Neal was just a boy when I taught him.
Henry: (confused) Wait. Aren’t you the same age? It seems like the more you guys tell me about my dad less things make sense. I don't wanna learn how to navigate. I just wanna hear something about him that doesn't make it sound like it's made up so I like this guy.
Hook: Your mother isn't keeping things from you because she doesn't want you to know the truth.
Henry: I know she's doing it to protect me. But how am I supposed to feel anything about him being gone if I don't know what he was like when he was here?
Hook: Fair enough, mate. What I haven't told you is why I taught your father to sail. Because he'd just lost his father. I thought the sea would help ease his sorrow.
Henry: Wait. He lost his dad, too?
Hook: Aye. To something dark and evil. When he wasn't much older than you.
Henry: Really?
Hook: Indeed. You see, you might not think you know much about your father but you have more in common with him than you realize.


SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. Zelena's Farmhouse. Zelena dresses up for the fight. She puts on a pair of green gloves, a necklace with a green gemstone, a black hat, and a pair of black shoes.


SCENE: The Enchanted Forest. Past. The Dark Castle. Zelena arranges a meat pie on the table. Rumpelstiltskin enters the room.



Rumplestiltskin: I don't remember giving permission for guests.
Zelena: That's for you. Meat pie. Just like the spinsters used to make when you were a boy.
Rumplestiltskin: Can't stay. Have a lesson to teach.
Zelena: But, we just finished a lesson.
Rumplestiltskin: Not with you, dearie. With Regina.
Zelena: You're still training her?
Rumplestiltskin: Did you think I was gonna stop?
Zelena: Wait. You don't need Regina. I'm going to cast your curse. (in a high-pitched voice) She's not nearly as powerful as me. She doesn't deserve to have you teaching her.
Rumplestiltskin: (interrupting her) Careful, Zelena. What was it your father used to always tell you?
Zelena: No matter, what you feel on the inside you always have to put on a good face.
Rumplestiltskin: You might wanna take his advice. Your inside is starting to show. (Shocked Zelena crosses the room so that she can look into a mirror. She discovers a green spot at her neck.) You're turning green, dearie. Envy will do this to you. And don't wait up. This could take a while.


SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. Main street. Citizens assemble to watch the upcoming fight.



Emma: Have you seen Regina?
Mary Margaret: Not since the vault.
Tinker Bell: If she hasn't get her soon that witch will take it out on all of us.
David: Let's take everybody out of here before that happens. (turning to the crowd) Alright, listen up. We need you to get back to your home.
Zelena: No one's going anywhere. (The crowd backs away from Zelena and Mr. Gold) This show needs an audience. (to Mr. Clark) Out of my way, munchkin.
Mr. Clark: I'm a dwarf.
Zelena: That's even worse. Where is she? Don't tell me. She's a coward. This isn't good. For all of you. If my sister isn't here in five minutes I'm going to let the Dark One of his leash.


SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. Main street. Five minutes later.



Zelena: Time's up. Who'd you wanna kill first, Rumple?
Emma: (stepping forward) He's not killing anyone. If you wanna fight someone, Zelena, fight me.
Zelena: Sorry dear, I don't dance with amateurs.
Emma: I'm not an amateur. I'm the savior.
Zelena: Looks like someone has an inflated sense of self-worth. (Zelena looks at Mr. Gold who directs his magic at Emma causing her to fall backwards) Anybody else wanna give it a go?
Regina: I do. (The crowd makes room for her) Didn't anyone tell you? Black is my color.
Zelena: (chuckles) But it looks so much better on me. I was beginning to think you aren't going to show up.
Regina: I couldn't let my sister off that easily.
Zelena: So, you've finally accepted me into the family?
Regina: I’ve accepted that we shared a mother, yes. But I still have one question: What the hell did I ever do to you?
Zelena: Isn't it obvious? You were born. (Regina slaps her in the face)
Regina: I’ve been waiting to do that. All day.
Zelena: Rumplestiltskin can't save you this time.


SCENE: Past. Enchanted Forest. Dark Castle. Regina is sitting at her dressing table. She combs her hair. Her father’s razor in hand Zelena approaches her from behind.



Zelena: Don't make a sound. Rumplestiltskin is wasting his time with you. You don't deserve him. You don't deserve any of this. Our mother couldn't see and neither can he. But I'll show them they're wrong. (Zelena stabs Regina’s neck. Giggling Rumplestiltskin reveals himself to Zelena. He removes the razor from his neck.)
Rumplestiltskin: Surprise, dearie. (standing up) As I always said jealousy drives people to do crazy things.
Zelena: You tricked me.
Rumplestiltskin: Consider it a test. One you failed.
Zelena: I was just trying to make your decision easier. Show you that I'm all powerful. That I'm the one who's going to cast your curse.
Rumplestiltskin: I appreciate your efforts, dearie, but I'm afraid you just disqualified yourself.
Zelena: What? Why?
Rumplestiltskin: Because casting the curse has a price. A steep one. You have to give up the thing you love most.
Zelena: I can do that.
Rumplestiltskin: That's the problem, dearie. The thing you love most is me.
Zelena: You think I love you?
Rumplestiltskin: I'm a perceptive soul.
Zelena: You're insane.
Rumplestiltskin: Besides the point. Dearie, it's okay. I know, I have that effect on women. You love me and that, dearie, makes you too dangerous.
Zelena: So, Regina
Rumplestiltskin: has the job. (He notices that Zelena’s green skin color spreads, rising to her cheek.) You might wanna get that checked.
Zelena: (angry) Forget the curse. I'll find another way to give you what you want.
Rumplestiltskin: Unless you can take me to a land without magic I'm afraid that's not possible.
Zelena: I can. I could have taken you there.
Rumplestiltskin: How?
Zelena: (showing her slippers to him) These slippers. The Wizard gave them to me and they can take you anywhere you want to go.
Rumplestiltskin: Wizard?
Zelena: (ignoring his last remark) But it's too late.
Rumplestiltskin: (nervous) Who said it's too late?
Zelena: You chose her.
Rumplestiltskin: Perhaps it was haste.
Zelena: I'm not naive. There's only one way you'll ever get these slippers from me. You'll have to kill me.
Rumplestiltskin: Well, if I must. (He leaps forward but she quickly disappears in a cloud of green smoke.)
Zelena: (materializing above Rumplestiltskin) You shouldn't have taught me all your tricks, Rumple. I'll see you again, dearie. Next time, you will choose me. (She clicks her heels together three times and disappears in a cloud of green smoke.)


SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. Main Street. Mr. Gold standing between them Zelena faces Regina.



Zelena: He should’ve chosen me.
Regina: Who?
Zelena: Rumplestiltskin.
Regina: That's what this is about? You're jealous of me?
(Regina looks up and focuses her magic at a set of traffic lights causing a pair of traffic lights to fall down. Zelena changes the direction of the piece so that it cannot harm her. Bystanders jump startled.)
Zelena: You still don't realize what you had. You never did. You got everything I ever wanted and you didn't even deserve it. But I'm gonna take it all from you. (Magically, Zelena jostles Regina away causing her to crash backwards into a blue car.)
Doc: My Miata.
(Regina recovers and walks up to her sister. Again she uses magic forming a fireball in one hand. However, before she’s able to use it Zelena puts out the fire. Zelena lifts her sister up into the air chocking her at the same time.)
Zelena: You can't beat me, little sis. Everything Rumplestiltskin taught you, he taught me, too. But I was the better student. (She sends Regina flying through the clock tower's window, then teleports herself close to Regina)
Regina: What are you waiting for? Kill me.
Zelena: I never said I wanted to kill you. I said I wanted to destroy you. And to do that I need your heart. (Zelena thrusts her hand into Regina’s chest. After a moment she withdraws empty-handed) Where is it?
Regina: My mother taught me one thing: Never bring your heart to a witch fight. Something you'd know if she hadn't abandoned you. (Magically, Regina pushes Zelena backwards)
Zelena: (angry) You haven't won, Regina. I will get your heart. I will get everything you ever had.
Regina: (smiles) Not today.
(Zelena summons her broom and leaves. Emma, Mary Margaret and David join Regina.)
Emma: Are you alright?
Regina: I'm still alive, aren't I?
David: Gold disappeared. We thought that meant she
Regina: defeated me? Hardly.
Mary Margaret: You've won?
Regina: Don't act so surprised. As it turns out Zelena wanted my heart. It's a good thing I wasn't stupid enough to bring it with me.
David: Any idea why she wants it?
Regina: Well, she got your courage and wants my heart. Those are ingredients.
Emma: For what? A curse?
Mary Margaret: We’re already in Storybrooke. We’ve already lost our memories. What else could she do to us?


SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. Somewhere in the woods. Hurriedly Regina runs into the forest. Pointing a flashlight here and there she’s looking for something.



Robin Hood: Did the plan work?
Regina: That depends - is it still here?
Robin Hood: Right, where you left it. (Nearby a tree he knells down and begins to dig up Regina’s heart.)
Regina: (relieved) Then it worked. I just needed to find the one thing I had that Zelena didn't.
Robin Hood: And what exactly was that? (He hands Regina her heart back)
Regina: My heartless mother. (She tucks her heart into a small satchel.) My sister was right about something. She said I don't always realize what I have right in front of me.
Robin Hood: (standing up) What's that?
Regina: Just, that I didn't always appreciate things. (pressing the satchel into Robin Hood’s hand) Would you mind holding on to this a little bit longer?
Robin Hood: (in mild disbelief) You're really going to entrust something so valuable to a common thief like me?
Regina: You can't steal something that's been given to you. (She turns around and starts to walk away.)
Robin Hood: You still owe me that drink.
Regina: Yes, I suppose, I do.


SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. The Blanchard loft.



Henry: Thanks, Kilian. Maybe we can go out on your boat again sometime.
Hook: Anytime, lad.
Emma: (Emma opens the door. She ruffles Henry’s hair) Hey. (Henry enters the apartment.)
Hook: How did the Queen fare against the Witch?
Emma: She survived. But the rest is definitely more than a doorway conversation. (Hook nods. Emma pauses and then decides to speak up once again.) Thanks for taking him.
Hook: There's more Bae in your boy than you realize. He needs to know about his father, Emma. You can't just take him back to New York when this is over and pretend like none of this is real.
Emma: Thanks again. (She steps back inside closing the door behind her. Hook exits.)


SCENE: Storybrooke. Present day. Zelena's Farmhouse. Zelena locks Mr. Gold up.




Mr. Gold: What, no meat pie? (Furious Zelena turns around the dagger in hand. Mr. Gold doubles over in pain.)
Zelena: She's clever, Rumple. But, so am I. Regina's heart is somewhere in this town. It's only a matter of time before I find it.
Mr. Gold: Whatever twisted curse you have planned, it won't change anything. If I had to do it all again, I'd still choose Regina.
Zelena: Would you, now? Well, I suppose we'll just have to wait and see.
Mr. Gold: I'm afraid, I don't understand.
Zelena: We are doing it all over again. What I'm casting isn't a curse. (chuckles) It's a second chance.


SCENE: Oz. Past. The Emerald City. Two guards try to prevent Zelena from entering the Wizard’s audience room. Using magic she flings both of them aside and enters.



Zelena: I learned some tricks while I was gone. You showed me my past. Now take me there. To the moment my mother abandoned me. That's when it all went wrong. I need to go back and change it. (The Wizard’s shadow appears on the curtain.)
The Wizard: You want to travel back in time? To change the past? (Laughing. Flames shoot up from the ground.)
Zelena: What's so funny?
The Wizard: I'm afraid that's impossible.
Zelena: I thought, you were the Great and Terrible Oz.
The Wizard: Even my power has its limits.
Zelena: (she rippes down the curtain.) You're telling me. (dragging the Wizard towards herself.)
The Wizard: No. Don't hurt me. Please.
Zelena: Who are you?
Wizard: My name is Walsh. I'm just a circus huckster. I'm a showman. I come from a distant land. A place called Kansas.
Zelena: You're not even a wizard?
Walsh: It's all part of the act. But, what I peddle is real. What you saw there is real (gesturing towards the ground). Those slippers (looking at Zelena’s shoes) took you to the Enchanted Forest, didn't they? I may not have magic. But the things I collect do.
Zelena: That's why you wanted me to bring you something of Rumplestiltskin's. So, you could carry on this charade.
Walsh: I didn't mean any harm. I was just trying to help us both. What you seek doesn't exist. No magic is that strong.
Zelena: Well, then I have no use for you. At least not like that.
Walsh: (standing up) Like what?
Zelena: What I need is someone willing to do whatever I ask without question. (Zelena notices a poster of Walsh’s circus. A flying monkey is advertised.) Like a trained circus animal.
Walsh: You're evil.
Zelena: Not evil, dear. Wicked.
Walsh: No. No. (He tries to flee. Green smoke covers him. As the green smoke clears, a flying monkey rises. It shrieks.)
Zelena: Much better. Now, come. (Obediently the monkey trudges after Zelena.) I'm going to find a way to change the past. I’ve got work to do.
(She directs her magic at the ground. Again, Regina practices to wield magic. She succeeds. Rumplestiltskin approaches her from behind.
Rumplestiltskin: Well done, Regina. You’ve been practicing. You’re shaping up to be the best pupil I ever had. (Regina smiles.))
Zelena: (watching the scene) We'll see about that. When I'm done, Regina, you'll never even been born. (Zelena’s green skin color spreads further, until her whole face is entirely green.)

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